World Class Hugs

By Rachel Puryear

Highly empathic people, just like anyone else, need to find careers that fit us well. We need to make a living, hopefully doing something we enjoy.

If we’re looking for a new career path, or how to better develop our current one, what are some things we should take into consideration?

Of course, much of that question will depend upon the individual, as highly empathic people do vary greatly in their preferences and interests – as does the rest of the population.

However, there are some things that we tend to share in common that we should consider in exploring different career possibilities. It’s important to career search with in mind who we actually are and what our strengths and weaknesses are, rather than what we’re told that we should be.

So, with that in mind, let’s explore a few basic questions that highly empathic people should ask themselves, when they’re considering new career trajectories:

Does It Fit Who I Am?

For highly empathic people (especially so), they want to feel as though their work has value, and serves an important purpose.

For some, that might mean a nonprofit route – but it doesn’t necessarily have to be. In fact, as I’ll discuss more below, that particular route is not for everyone – and that’s okay.

What’s more key instead is knowing that the work is doing good in the world – whether on a large scale, or on a small one (and usually, it’s on a smaller one – but that matters, too, and lots of people doing good on a smaller scale really adds up).

What is the Lifestyle Like?

Highly empathic people can love their work as much as anyone else (or not, if it’s not a good fit). However, that doesn’t change the fact that were usually the kind of people who need our down time, and also some time in our schedule when we can just do nothing.

Having to work long hours, constantly be on call, and always working at a fast pace nonstop will quickly burn us out – even if we started out enjoying our jobs.

As an important part of deciding whether an industry, position, or company is right for you; find out more about the lifestyles of the people already in those positions, and whether that is realistically sustainable and enjoyable for you.

Do many people already working in this path have flexibility? If you desire remote or hybrid work, are those options commonly available? What kind of hours do people typically work? If you have children or caregiving responsibilities, how do others with such obligations feel about their ability to balance those with their work obligations?

These are important questions to ask early on, rather than later.

What is the Pay Range?

Don’t feel bad for taking this consideration seriously. This has an important bearing on your ability to provide for yourself and your family, how empowered you are to build wealth and live a more comfortable and secure life, and reduce stress and hardship in your life. There is nothing wrong with turning down a career you’d otherwise consider; if it would leave you excessively indebted, impoverished, or trapped at a low pay grade for the longer term.

You probably aren’t driven by the thought of a flashy lifestyle, and aren’t interested in keeping up with the Joneses. Nonetheless, you have every right to pursue being comfortable, secure, well taken care of, getting your needs met, and having enough money to retire someday, and enough to do what you really love.

Don’t underestimate this one, or sell yourself short because you think you “should” be sacrificing to do any particular thing.

Is the Level of Overwhelm One I Can Manage?

Most empathic and HSP people are introverts, though not all. Even if you’re an extraverted empathic person, though, there is still a point where too much overstimulation and overwhelm – particularly on a constant basis – get to be too much. Over an extended period of time, this can negatively impact job performance, as well as overall mental and physical health.

Empathic people are prone to this sort of general problem, but we also vary in what is more and less manageable for us day-to-day.

A job dealing with people on a regular basis may or may not work for you. Or, it might depend upon whether this is a team we’re familiar with, or the general public.

Or, it could also depend a great deal on whether the people we’re working with and for are typically in a good place and happy to see us; or whether every day is filled with people who are angry, in a bad place, stressed, traumatized, grieving, and don’t want to be there.

(I’ve done customer service-oriented jobs serving mostly happy people, and others serving mostly miserable people. It’s a world of difference between the two.)

A great many empathic people are drawn to helping, caring professions – or feel like they “should” be, and that that’s the best place for their empathy and compassion. Such professions include, but are not limited to; health care (mental and physical), counseling/therapies, teaching, social work, or caregiving. Or, they might choose a field not generally associated with empathy and caring, but choose a subfield that is – for instance, going into law, but working for a social justice nonprofit or a public defender.

Each one of those caring professions can often also come with work cultures that are brutal, toxic, and backstabbing. Colleagues might frequently be jaded, incompetent, or throwing others under the bus to get ahead in a tightly competitive and unforgiving atmosphere.

I certainly don’t want to characterize all nonprofits and caring-based work cultures this way – there are definitely plenty of good ones out there, too, and they deserve far more credit and recognition than they usually get.

However, anyone who assumes that an empathy-based professions automatically means a supportive and caring workplace, will likely be in for a rude awakening.

If you want to go into a field like this, I would not discourage you – but just be realistic about the day-to-day, and try to get insights from people already working in a desired role before jumping into it.

If you decide being in a specific caring profession is not for you, and that you cannot stand working every day with people who are unhappy and difficult and suffering a great deal; that is totally okay. You do not have to do that if it’s not for you, and it doesn’t make you any less empathic or caring or wonderful. It may simply mean that your talents, and what you have to give, instead lies elsewhere – which bring us to the next question.

Does the Industry or Company Culture Value What I Have to Give?

This is a critically important, yet often woefully overlooked, consideration.

No one can sustain trying to fit into a culture that is a poor fit for them over the long term, and not suffer ill effects on their health and well-being.

A workplace or industry does NOT even have to be toxic, or staffed largely with unhappy employees, to simply not be right for you. If most people working there are satisfied with their jobs; but it’s because they want very different things out of a career than you do, and because they fit well into a company culture that you’re uncomfortable in; that’s probably a good indicator that it’s not the right place for you.

If you are a highly empathic/highly sensitive person, you have amazing gifts to give. Your empathy, your thoughtfulness, your intelligence, your ability to see the bigger picture, your ability to appreciate perspectives and priorities other than your own, your conscientiousness, your insights, your caring, your integrity are all incredibly valuable. Never underestimate the power of these qualities.

If you find yourself surrounded by people who think you should instead be tougher, louder, bolder, work ridiculous hours to “prove” your dedication, or even tell you that you don’t deserve to get ahead because you don’t use and discard people readily like they do; get new people to surround yourself with. Seriously, before these people start making you sick.

There are many people out there who will value your gifts, and want you on their team. Your task is to find them. That’s not always easy, but it certainly can be done if you don’t lose sight of the fact that they’re out there, and really want to find you, too. Besides, the effort is well worth it in the long run.

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Thank you, dear readers, for reading, following, and sharing. Here’s to empathic people going into great careers that fit them well, and where they can also be their best for others. If you enjoyed this content and want to see more of it, please hit “like” and subscribe, if you have not done so already. xoxo

Check out my other blog, too – Free Range Life, at https://freerangelife.net. It’s about road trips to parks and other cool places to see, how wealth is built – as well as why unequal opportunities persist, remote/passive income streams, and van/RV life generally.

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