By Rachel Puryear
If you’re in a relationship with a highly empathic person, consider yourself very lucky. These folks, making up around 20% of the population, come equally in all genders, and from all walks of life (a similar proportion of many other animal species also have a corresponding trait like this). They also love deeply, and make incredibly loyal and devoted partners, on the whole.
Ideally, highly empathic people are best matched to other highly empathic partners – or, if not, then to partners who are at least moderately empathic, as opposed to those on the opposite end of that spectrum. It’s simply a matter of compatibility; and likelihood of shared values, mutual understanding, and the ability to best meet one another’s needs.
So, with this in mind, how would you know whether your partner – or a potential partner – is a highly empathic person? Even if you are one yourself, you might not be aware of what that means yet – and not realize the signs that someone else is also like you. That you’re already normal and awesome as you are, and that you’re not the only one who’s like you. You might have given up on finding a match, and instead be trying to better fit into the mainstream – but that’s a disaster waiting to happen.
The thing is, other highly empathic people might be hiding their own emotional depth and sensitivity as well, for the same reasons you likely are. And, for good reason – in a tough world, where we’re in the minority, it’s easy to get badly burned if we’re not careful.
Accordingly, here are some signs that someone else is a highly empathic person (even if they’re trying to hide it):
Pink neon sign with the word “love”. By Shaira Dela Peña.
They’re a Giver
An empathic lover will tend to put their beloved first, sometimes even going so far as to neglect their own needs in the process. They’re definitely not the selfish “me, me first, and only me!” type of person that’s all too prevalent out there.
It’s quite refreshing. Just be sure to make a point of also giving back to them.
Still Waters Run Deep
An empathic person will usually seem quiet and reserved at first. This can lead people to sometimes misread them as cold, aloof, or uncaring – but that’s certainly not true.
It is true that they don’t give their hearts away readily, and often want to take their time to get to know someone and build a bond. They’ve all been let down before by people who didn’t care as much as they did, so they want to feel safe with someone before letting them fully in.
But once they let someone in, they will be devoted and loving in a way that many won’t be used to, if they’ve never had an empathic lover before.
So be patient with them.
At the Same Time, They Can Seem Distant
Empathic people can appear distant from others at times – they will be off in their own little world now and then. However, it doesn’t mean they care about you any less, or aren’t still there for you and others they also love.
Their imaginations are often vivid, and they tend to have a rich inner life. They might find their internal world more interesting – or demanding their attention – than the external world, especially in life’s many drab moments.
Or, if it goes deeper and they are struggling emotionally, they often keep it to themselves. They’re don’t tend to readily rant, or rage – at least not where you can see easily. They tend to contain a lot within, even while often being acutely aware of others’ feelings, at the same time.
If you know and love them, you will in time learn to notice subtleties, and have a better sense of what they’re feeling – even if not always why. Particularly if you’re also an empathic person yourself.
Their Love is Intense
Once an empathic person falls in love with someone, they do so deeply. Their feelings for loved ones are incredibly strong, and they typically make loyal and devoted partners. They tend to be faithful partners – however the involved partners might define that.
That’s not to say that all of an empathic person’s relationships – romantic or otherwise – will always work out. Certainly they don’t, and empathic people have their share of heartache and broken relationships, too – and for various reasons.
They Are Refreshingly Honest
You can usually count on a highly empathic lover to tell you the truth, sometimes even to a startling extent. They believe in transparency, and they say what they believe.
That’s not in a “I’m-being-rude-and-hurtful-but-couching-it-in-pseudo-honesty” way – but rather, they typically act with sincerity and with integrity.
Note: That’s not the say they never tell little white lies, or withhold things they’re not yet ready to share. But they don’t tend to tell lies about serious, consequential matters.
They’ll Want the Same Things From You, Too
As I have said previously, an empathic person is usually best matched with another empathic person – and it’s very unlikely that a low-empathy person would ever be able to meet their needs.
However, things don’t always happen that way in real life.
Therefore, even if one partner is highly empathic while the other is more moderately so, the highly empathic partner would still need for the other person to possess the qualities here at least to a large extent, and to understand their importance.
Once They Open Themselves to You, They’re in It For the Long Run
Highly empathic people – for as much as others often confide in them, and as good listeners to others as they tend to be – don’t open themselves up readily to others. They like to be pretty sure about someone else before they put themselves out there, knowing that not everyone will love and accept them as they are without trying to change them into something they’re not.
Accordingly, when an empathic person does fully open up to another, they’re in it for the long run. They’ve given this a lot of thought, and aren’t going anywhere.
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- 52 Essential Relationships, an Emotional Intelligence Game to build trust and support to transform understanding.
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Thank you, dear readers, for reading, following, and sharing. Here’s to the deep, enduring, awesome love of a highly empathic person. If you enjoyed this content and want to see more of it, please hit “like” and subscribe, if you have not done so already. Xoxo
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World Class Hugs 
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