Afraid You’ll Burden Others by Asking for What You Want? It May Be the Opposite is True.

By Rachel Puryear

Most of us, at least sometimes, have some trouble asking others for what we want, and particularly asking for help. Doing so might make us feel like we are being demanding, needy, or burdening others. As a result, we often refrain from asking and hope others will just figure it out – which most often leaves us unfulfilled, and/or leaves others guessing at how to remain on good terms with us.

A hand held out with the palm turned upward, as if to ask for something.

Is this really a good way to relieve some pressure on others? Or to make it easier to be around us?

Is it possible we could actually help others more by…giving them clear guidance? By letting them know where things stand?

Might that actually lessen our demands on others? To not make them feel like they need a crystal ball to know what we want? To tell them exactly what is expected of them?

When you ask people for what you want, then they know what you want. When you ask for help, you are more likely to get it, and you also give others an opportunity to do something they will feel good about. Chances are, others around you are not psychic. This way, you help them to help you.

Making yourself easy for others to help, helps you get helped more. Making yourself difficult for others to help, well…tends to have the opposite effect. Other people around you likely want to help you more than you might think, but making it easier for them makes it much more likely to actually happen.

So, do yourself and others a favor, and be more willing to ask for help. It’s not easy, it’s hard for me to do it, too. But it’s worth practicing. Give it a try, if it’s not something you’re already accustomed to.

Thanks for reading, following, and sharing, dear readers! xo

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